For all the fabulous finds out there, there are many items of strangeness. Take, for example, the following:

Shoe designers spend all day thinking about how to design shoes which for all occasions and aspects of life. Now, I can only image what the design-pitch for this was. Euophony

“Ok guys,  now imaging you are a young, modern woman just graduating from clown college, venturing out on her own. Now what are you going to wear during a night out on the town? Not those big, clunky (oversized) work shoes – no, this woman needs something better. Sexy but still with a hint of the big-top circus.”

I don’t know what would look decent with this, and maybe I don’t want to know. My worry is that someone might try to match this shoe to something patterned in the same colors. The design itself is not bad, but the color, oh the color.

Editor

Yes, Anne Klein, I’m looking at you.

And I know you can make cute, sexy shoes! I even support you, as I just bought these in black patent; they’ll be perfect for Valentine’s Day night-out. (The little pendant on the front has a lion. Rawr.)

[P.S. Having bought a pair of platform heels, I’m now relived from my previous-post’s fashion crisis. And I did happen to come across a pair of shoes that were knock-offs of the aforementioned Pradas, and they were not so good. Sigh]

The ironic thing is that the higher up in fashion (price and designer-wise) you get, the weirder things are – witness Lady Gaga, a (pant-less) clothes-horse who loves the oddity. But when you see strange things in regular ready-to-wear, I wonder how many people out there like it enough to, you know, wear it.

[Shudder]

 

(I know what you must be thinking; Why the umbrella?)

[Fashion Binge.]

The worst part about having a shopping addiction problem is when the items you want have a legitimate place in your wardrobe.

A couple weeks ago the boyfriend and I went out to a lovely Italian restaurant in SF (the Magic Flute, which was supremely awesome, I do recommend it) and I was faced with the fact that my “going” out wardrobe needs updating, or expanding. I’ve been so busy with my work-looks (i.e. looking just-so while hopefully expanding the minds of college freshmen) that I forgot all about the equally important night-look! Granted, I usually spend Saturday nights watching Criminal Minds and eating soy ice-cream due to the “convenient” schedule of said boyfriend, who works as a residential youth counselor, but still! Add to that the fact that I recently dropped several dress-sizes, which means that basically most of my clothes are a bit bigger on me, which for going-out is not so good.

A girl needs options!

But when such options are not used every day, there’s no point in over-spending, and I if anything a smart shopper (except I will never embrace my mother’s adage that you can save 100% off an item if you don’t buy it at all – no fun). I was quite happy to snag a deal on this shirt, with silver-white beading instead of grey. Just loose enough to balance a super-tightly dressed lower half. ($19.99 marked down from $88 – it’s like a drug!) Quotation: Matty M Jersey Tank with Beaded Neckline

(Maybe you see where I’m going…) This isn’t the exact skirt, but similar…and so cute! It actually unzips though, which means I have to wear the zipper on the front, otherwise bad things could…happen.

Jack BB Dakota-The Shanae Skirt in Black

I also tried on  several spectacular-looking shoes, but ultimately chickened out – you see, I’ve had mixed opinions about the “latest” shoes, the ones that are sky high with hidden platforms and insane strappiness. You’ve seen the like, I’m sure. (Still can’t get on board with the whole “caged-in” look)GraysonThey just seem impractical, and too extreme. But things are changing, and now I am in need. Maybe Lady Gaga is sneaking in somewhere. Tried on a pair of black-patent Nine West (not expensive, a plus) sandals with a platform and what must be 5 inch heels, at least, and I was surprised at how comfortable they were, due to the platform, I’m sure.

Nine West Women's Elkie Platform Sandal

But these seem a bit better to me, more wearable (though the pair I tried on had a different ankle strap, this one seems less flattering). The only problem with heels this high, even though they’e do-able (ha, ha ha) you have to walk different, and I’m a fast-walker by nature, not used to being slowed down by anything over 4 inches. Nine West Hambert

So I think I might be able to rock this pair in “real life” more easily – plus, they’re blue! I don’t have any blue shoes…..yet……

But then again, don’t these look practical to you? Basic black, un-adorned, simple? Perfect for any occasion and season? Yes? Really?

(Did I mention they were Prada? Does that change your answer?)

Now let me ask you, is is wrong to spend an entire month of graduate student-teacher’s salary on a pair of Prada platform crisscross sandals that may or may not be in next season?

[Yes. Dammit.]

I’m putting the word out there, fashion gods. Send me the perfect pair of platform sandals – oh, and if they could be on sale and versatile, that would be great.

Because sometimes a grad student needs to put down the books, and go out. In the perfect pair of shoes. How else can we change the image of people who read too many books?

Because every female on Facebook is updating their status with the color of their bra (yes, I let the cat out of the bag) for “cancer awareness” – I admit, I did it too, though I’m not sure if it actually has anything to do with breast cancer awareness or was just made up by some person with nothing to do – I thought I’d share my own stupid bra story. Just for kicks.

Today, I did a stupid thing, and as a veteran snagger-of-deals, I must lament.

This evening, I cruised over the local outlet mall to buy a couple things, including some new underclothing things. I walked in, wandered over to what I was looking for, selected a few, and proceeded to the dressing room where I tried said items on. (And while we’re here, why is it so annoying to try on underwear in public? And why, in the name of all that is good, do they put the tags right in the area where you would otherwise put a limb? How do they expect you to get the right fit if you’re being poked to death by sharp paper? By the time I’m done in the dressing room I look as if I’ve been assaulted by an army of tiny paper-wielding elves.)

[Tangent.]

I found what I wanted. The brand had a buy three for 15.99 thing going on, which I ignored because I didn’t have an intention of buying three. And I was already thinking that I was getting a good deal, as the same item would have cost me about $11 more if I had bought it at Macy’s rather than the outlet store. So  I get to the register, and the woman tells me about the deal, which I turned down, because I didn’t want any more colors. I leave.

Then, at the exact time I turn my car onto the road heading home, my brain turns on and I realize that I am an idiot because I didn’t do the math: basically, if I had paid about $2 more, I could have got an entire extra bra. Two dollars!! Not that I really needed another one, but hey, what’s the difference?

Then, when I got home, I actually did the numbers and had another moment of idiocy. Sigh.

[I could always go back and exchange…..but do I really need it? (No.) ]

See kids, this is why you need to take math class: for when you buy underwear on sale.

[Except don’t ask me what a squirrel has to do with anything…]